Camp Day 5: Heading Home

I woke up this morning having finally succeeded in sleeping the whole night from 10pm to 5am without getting up to go to the loo. The 'no drinks after 8pm' thing definitely works; the only trouble is the then two hours of relative inactivity before brushing teeth and another final toilet visit at 10pm. But it's the way to go. Read my book. Messaged friends. Pondered life's imponderables. Sobered up. Considered next steps.

My bedraggled tent this morning.

Oh yeah, and the double black mat tent base beneath the yoga mat was also a win, comfort-wise.

Had another shower and the one in the middle works better than the one on the right. Tried on my new browny-green charity shop semi cargo pants and they seem to fit pretty well considering I couldn't try them on in the shop. Almost perfect I would say. Don't know why it says 's' on the inner band. Maybe it doesn't stand for small. Maybe it stands for ... semi browny-green cargo pants. Why are they semi, I hear you ask? They only have one cargo pocket on the right hand side and none on the left.

Much wetter morning. Not raining exactly, just wet. The water simply appeared through the night out the air. Didn't bother folding up my tent and squeezing it into its bag, instead opting to leave it slightly unravelled in the back of the car to dry out somewhat as I drove. The midges also reared their ugly heads, but even though I had my midgie hood I was currently in breakfast mode and the two things are mutually exclusive. I was out of bagels and pancakes so all I had to break my fast was orange juice, coffee, a banana, and my last two variety cereal boxes. Then I packed everything up and, double checking the shower cubicle to see if I'd left my favourite black Stusi cap (despite it heating up so much during a hot lunchtime it's given me heatstroke so now I pour cold water into to it for preventative measures on such a day) and finding it, I made like a tree and got the hell out of there.

But I also seem to have mislaid said Swiss army knife.

It was good to be back on the road again though, and I was making good time to get down the A9 to my 9am swim in Bathgate. The only troubles being I needed to check the tyre pressure, charge the car, get some decent chow into me, and get a pressie for my son, as to get a tiny cheese grater for my wife and nothing for my son (or dog) seemed wrong somehow.

So I turned off the A9 after one song at a place called Bankfoot Services (Taste Perthshire), where I plugged the Leaf into a nearby Chademo and parked myself under the Gazebo out of the rain until it opened at 8am. While I was writing the cutest thing happened. A little stoat-like creature scuttled out of the bushes between the tables, saw me, stopped in its tracks as we regarded each other in surprise, and then shot back under cover from whence it came. I had no chance to grab a camera (in the car) or even raise my iphone. We just gazed into each other's eyes for a few tiny heartbeats, and then it was gone. I'll draw a sketch from memory.

An artist's impression of The Beast Of Bankfoot

As I said I was hoping to get down the road as soon as possible, but now I'm here I'm kind of loathe for this to end as abruptly as planned. I've just got the tent sleeping thing down. Surely I can find another window to swim and drink coffee. It's my house that's the problem. It's my home and its millions of distractions. The internet. Clutter. Family. Dog. It's impossible to concentrate. I disappear like a 3D magic eye image and disintegrate into nothing but colourful yet meaningless 2D squiggles.

Now this Bankfoot place has opened I have had a delicious small 'Taste Perthshire' breakfast with very good sausages and grilled bacon from local butchers, and a cafe latte. My mac is plugged in and both my phone and mac are getting juiced up. The only trouble is the wifi is not wifi-ing so Vodafone is going to kick up a fuss at the end of the month for hotspots.

Damn, this place is buzzing now and it's only 8:45am.

I'm now in Waterstones cafe back on my home turf, determined to finish off this run of posts before getting assimilated back into the Borg.

At Bankfoot I bought my son a canvas bag which he'd been mentioning he wanted (£70) and promised myself to pop into Pets at Home to pick up a treat for Cocoa, our chocolate labrador, as she already had plenty of tennis balls, none of the play bones in the shop had her name on them, and a pair of human slippers just for a dog to chew seemed exorbitant.

That done, I climbed into my car and drove down the A9 and M90 home on familiar roads, singing along to my train playlist and enjoying my own wee world.

Hopefully that orb of peace and contentedness can be found again someday.

Chris Young Was Here

Stats:

Nights: 4

Days : 5

Miles Driven: 150 miles

Money Spent:

Rings = £18.9 x 2 = £38.80

Invermill = £20 x 2 = £40

Ossian's latte & donut = £6

Semi-cargo brown trousers = £7

Atholl Pizza = £24

Bankfoot Brunch = £14

Son's canvas bag = £70

Wife's Mini Grater = £4

Route Taken

Camp Off! The Rings vs Inver Mill

Quieter: Rings

Cheaper: Rings

Rivers: Mill

Horizon: Rings

Interesting animal species: Rings

Friendliness of other guests: Rings

Internationality of guests: Mill

Friendliness of staff: Rings

Nearby places of interest (Ossian & Dunkeld) : Mill x 2

Less midges: Rings

Less wind chill factor: Mill

Open fire?: Rings

Showers: Rings

Communal area: Rings

Tea & coffee: Rings

Books & DVDs: Rings

Activity area for kids: Rings

Fishing: Mill

Less asked to move car: Rings

Distance to toilets: Draw

Ease of booking: Rings

Wifi and/or mobile signal : Rings

Results: Rings - 16 ; Mill - 6

Winner: The Rings!